


You'll Always Get Your Way

by flowercrowniall



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Christmas, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Holidays, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-12
Updated: 2014-12-12
Packaged: 2018-03-01 03:53:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2758607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowercrowniall/pseuds/flowercrowniall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>American high school au where Louis goes off to college and leaves behind a lovesick Harry who can’t make himself tell Louis how he really feels (much to everyone’s displeasure). Featuring sickeningly adorable Ziam, prophetical Niall, and lots of Christmas fluff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You'll Always Get Your Way

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sarcasticfluentry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarcasticfluentry/gifts).



> I hope everyone enjoys this- it’s the first larry fic I’ve been able to finish. I’m so glad I got to write for sarcasticfluentry- I love your fics and your prompts were amazing! Thank you so much to my beta for helping me with this and listening to me worry about it being good enough. Title is from “Shiver” by Coldplay which fits this fic quite nicely

“Cheer up Harry, it’s finally summer!” Niall had said as he walked with a dejected Harry after the last bell of the school year, watching as Louis threw his papers off the stairs along with the other seniors.

~•~

 “Cheer up Harry, this is the best graduation party ever!” Niall had shouted drunkenly as Harry stood there blankly with a red, plastic cup in his hand watching as Louis pranced around the dance floor, cheeks rosy and pretty from alcohol.

~•~

“Cheer up Harry, you’ll see him again soon.” Niall had said softly, throwing an arm around Harry’s shoulder watching as Louis drove away, trying not to cry.

~•~

“Cheer up Harry it’s the first day of junior year- we’re halfway there!” Niall says now as he, Harry, and Liam sit in the buzzing courtyard before their first day of school.

Harry pushes his sunglasses up his nose and mumbles, “It’s the first day of school without Louis.”

Around them, friends reunite loudly and happily, asking how each other’s summer went. The sun pours light and heat into the commons area so that the grass Harry is sat in licks wetly at the palm of his hands he supports himself on. He pushes up his glasses up again and scoffs at the couples who hug and kiss lovingly.

Liam sighs and Niall chuckles hopelessly, “Harry, you’ve got to get over it man. Let’s just enjoy being upperclassmen now yeah? And, hey, if Liam can, so can we.”

Liam shrugs nonchalantly, shoulders hitting the bottom of his jaw from the way he’s hunched forward with his head in his hands, “Yeah it sucks Zayn’s not here and it’ll be weird for a while but, I don’t know. Like Niall said, you’re halfway there might as well enjoy the rest of it.” He sits up now with a cocky grin on his lips “As for me, this is my last year being stuck in this school.”

Harry grumbles about it but he loosens up a bit and lets a little grin tug at his lips, they were right. It may be weird without Louis and Zayn but there’s only two years left before he finally gets to leave and join them in the real world.  

He could go on pining over Louis hopelessly, missing his best friend who lives a four hour drive away now instead of a two minute walk, as long as he kept it to himself. Like Liam said, it will be weird for a while but soon it will be the norm not to have Louis radiating light and laughter wherever he and Harry go. Harry will eventually get used to walking around without his other half and he’s not sure why that’s so discomforting.

~•~

Harry’s thumbs flew over his keyboard while he hastily tried to text Louis back in the middle of studying. He was torn; the next day he had a test in psychology he really needed to study for but this is the fastest Louis has been replying since he started school, usually he was always too busy with homework.

“I’m sorry H, I just really need to stay on top of my schooling if I don’t want to flunk out of college my first year.” He had said one night before cutting their Skype session short.

Harry hadn’t minded, mostly because Louis really had looked exhausted with his matted down hair and tired smile. But no matter how adorable he is when he’s sleepy and murmuring softly, Harry couldn’t stand to see him looking so fragile.

So obviously Harry’s current conversation with Louis over text about the crazy person who lives across the hall from him in his dorm is way more important than getting a good grade on his psychology test.

Harry is in way too deep and he gets that. He knows he’s bottling up his feelings and when they finally explode his friendship with Louis will suffer. But for now he’s going to admire from afar and say nothing about how much he really loves Louis and how just being friends, even best friends, has never really been enough. If he really needs to say anything so badly to the point where his chest constricts with it, he can talk to Liam about it. And if his eyes prick when he’s forgotten for a moment that he can’t just walk down the street to see his best friend, he’ll call Niall up and they’ll laugh until Harry’s forgotten why he called him in the first place.

~•~

There’s this little thing that’s been driving Harry crazy lately. It started two nights ago when he was skyping with Louis, the other had stopped in the middle of his story interrupted by the buzzing of his phone. He had read something on it with this mischievous look on his face which made Harry think he was up to no good and of course the suspicion only grew when Louis hastily made up an excuse of why he suddenly had to go.

Up until then Harry really hadn’t considered that Louis could possibly be seeing guys at college. And he felt so naive for thinking that Louis really wouldn’t, that just because he had been single for the past two years he would stay single when he went away and met a ton of older, attractive, put-together college boys. 

Now it was all Harry could think about. It kept him up at night and the question stayed at the tip of his tongue whenever he was on the phone with Louis. He wants so badly to ask but he’s scared that the answer he’ll get won’t be the answer he wants to hear.

“I need you guys to be completely honest with me,” Harry begins one day at lunch, looking as stern as he can manage at Niall and Liam “Is Louis hooking up with someone?”

He’s come to them because if his suspicion is true, it’ll hurt a little less coming from them.

“Define hooking up.” Liam says meekly.

“Is he having sex with them? Is he talking to them?” Harry pressed.

“Nooooooo.”

“Definitely not!”

The other two insist but there’s no conviction behind it.

“You’re lying to me.” Harry says it blunt and blank.

Niall sighs, “Harry… he’s in college. It’s normal that he wants to, like, experience new things.”

“Yeah I get it,” Harry nods because he does, he really does. It’s not like Louis knows how Harry feels and even if he did it wouldn’t matter since they’re not together “I just thought, you know, maybe…”

“We know man. You don’t have to explain yourself.” Liam saves him from having to articulate the thousand thoughts going a million miles a minute in his head right now.

It’s just that he thought maybe Louis liked him back. Maybe there could have been this small chance the terms of endearment and affection from him had some bigger meaning than just a testament to how close they are. He thought maybe Louis wouldn’t want to hook up with other guys because they’re not Harry. But the other part of Harry that isn’t crushed by reality is irrevocably jealous of those guys that get to be with Louis like that. They get to have a sort of intimacy with him Harry never will.

It might be a little embarrassing but Harry’s always wanted to have sex with Louis, slow and sweet, wants to make Louis say his name breathy and needy. He’d be so pretty all spread out on the bed with lust in his eyes, mouth swollen and red from kissing, arching his back for it. Jealousy flares all over in Harry that people who aren’t him get to see Louis like that.

“If it makes you feel any better,” Liam says while casually peeling an orange “Zayn says Louis isn’t really talking to anyone just, you know, having one offs.”

And somehow, it does make Harry feel a little better, somehow he can live knowing it’s dirty and quick, no meaning behind it besides the need to get off- never sweet and slow.

~•~

A food coma is trying to pull Harry under but he fights it because four (Louis being the missing fifth) of his best friends are sitting in his living room. Liam and Zayn are cuddled up on the loveseat, practically all they’ve done since Zayn’s been back. Niall is eating pumpkin pie while laughing next to Harry at some story Zayn is telling (it’s yet another one about the crazy person who lives across from him and Louis).

Harry’s happy to be here right now he really is. He loves how it smells like pumpkin spice and gravy, loves the warmth radiating from the fireplace right into his heart so he feels warm and cuddly inside, loves being surrounded by his friends who seem just that little bit happier to have one-fifth of their group back. He just misses Louis.  It’s not fair to that he couldn’t come home because he’s doing poorly in calculus and his teacher offered help during the break. It’s not fair that Harry hasn’t seen him in three months.

They’ve spent the past two years’ worth of holidays together because of their moms and it’s just weird not seeing Louis play with his little siblings and help his mom get all of their plates together for dinner. Usually he would be sitting right next to Harry right now, cold feet tucked under his thighs while they shared the blanket only Harry uses currently. 

Everyone notices how much Harry misses him. Harry’s mom has been shooting him looks of sympathy throughout the day and his sister made a snarky remark about how she thinks Harry would rather have Louis home than her. To top it off the other boys are getting in on the pity now too.

“Hey Harry what’s got you so quiet over there?” Niall teases through a mouthful of pumpkin pie.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full, Niall. And nothing ‘m just really tired. All that food is weighing me down.” Harry replies while closing his eyes as if to prove his fatigue.

“Are you sure it’s got nothing to do with our missing person?” Zayn presses from underneath where Liam’s sitting on his lap on the loveseat. They’re nauseating really.

“Yes I’m sure-” Harry grumbles and would continue but he’s cut off by his ringtone.

“Who is it?” Niall smirks knowingly.

“No one.” Harry snaps before swiping his thumb across the screen of his phone “Hello?” He cringes at how notably softer his voice gets while the others laugh.

“Hi Harry, what’re you doing?” Louis sounds calm, like when he’s been laying down for a while before getting bored and calling Harry.

Which, now that he’s all alone at college during a major holiday, that’s probably exactly what he’s been doing.

“Just sat here with Niall and Liam and Zayn.” Harry turns his back on said people as to not see the rude things they mouth and gesture with their hands. They’re practically legal adults but they act like children ninety-percent of the time.

Louis doesn’t respond for a moment and Harry thinks he’s upset him but Louis speaks again before he can apologize, “Can you maybe, like, put me on speaker phone? So it’s kind of like I’m there with you guys?”

“‘Course.” Harry swallows and does as he’s asked “You’re on speaker now.”

“Hey guys!” Louis’ voice is staticy and tinny coming through Harry’s phone but it still fills up the room.

The others chorus back an ill-timed hello and right away start to banter. Harry can hear Louis’ voice getting more energized by the minute and it hurts to think that some two-hundred miles away Louis is sitting in an empty dorm all by himself and Harry wants nothing more than to be with him.

But this will do, he thinks contently while three loud laughs and a tiny fourth one fill up his living room.

~•~

Snow is tumbling down in thick flurries from a dark grey sky outside. Everything is covered with a two inch blanket of crisp, white snow. It’s the kind of snow that sticks when it melts and piles up quickly. The trees no longer reflect fall but now the cold, lifelessness of winter with their bare branches and greyed bark. Harry watches it all from inside the library, a giant glass window displays the commons area of outside which is usually bright with sunlight and littered with high school students but is now barren and desolate. Sometimes a sheet of snow will fall from the roof or an icicle will stab the ground before shattering into a million pieces. There’s no other movement aside from that outside.

But inside Harry’s just heard the light tap of footsteps coming from someone who doesn’t carry a single worry on his shoulders and a shock of blonde hair has entered his peripheral vision.

“Harry, Harry Styles, the apple of my eye, the light of my life, I have a huge favor to ask you.” Niall says, rudely interrupting Harry in the middle of studying for his precalc midterm.

It’s not for another two weeks but Harry has never liked cramming.

“What Niall?” Harry responds shortly, scanning over his textbook.

“So as you know Louis is coming home in two weeks and I really, really, like, really need you to tell him how you feel and not that he’s the bestest friend you’ve ever had or something like that, but full out ‘I’m so in love that I have multiple playlists on my phone dedicated to you and the moment you text me I drop everything to respond’.”

“I do not.” Harry lies while he turns red up to his ears.

Niall gives him a pointed look before going back to begging, clasping his hands together, “Please Harry I can’t take this anymore. You’ve been head over heels for him since we were freshmen. Look at you now! You’re studying for midterms early so you don’t have to when he gets here.”

Harry starts to get defensive, “That’s not true I’ve always started studying early and you know that.”

“Yeah but c’mon, you know you factored his arrival in the decision to come to this god forsaken library and look over precalc a week before anybody else will.” Niall slaps his hand on the black and white pages Harry has been willing himself to stare at for the past hour.

The librarian shoots them a look that makes Harry cower but Niall remains oblivious and continues on.

“If not for me then for you yeah? I know it’s killing you. You’re a hopeless romantic that believes in fate and all that. You think that if you hadn’t, like, peed on the poor guy in the bathroom first day of freshmen year you guys would have gone all throughout high school without knowing each other. I know you think you’re going to end up with him in the end so why postpone it any longer? Just tell him already!” He shouts the last part, apparently getting a little too caught up in his motivational speech and forgetting they’re in a library.

So that’s how they get kicked out and that’s how come a not-so-happy Harry snaps at Niall.

“I’m not going to! Just leave it okay? I’m a junior at in high school and he’s a freshman in college. I lost my chance months ago! And now it just wouldn’t work with him being four fucking hours away!” He lets out a shaky exhale and clenches his fist.

This is why Harry tries not to think about this subject for too long or too hard because whenever he does he just ends up hurt and angry like he is now.

“Okay,” Niall begins seemingly unphased “Let’s say worst case scenario: you tell him and he doesn’t feel the same way. It’s awkward as shit for a little while but then you guys go back to being completely normal, best friends forever and whatnot.” 

Harry laughs bitterly and shakes his head, “And what about how long I’ll feel like complete shit for when I get rejected? It wouldn’t work Niall, you don’t understand.”

“But I do!” Niall argues “It doesn’t take rocket science to see you guys are fucking meant for each other. You’re making this way harder than it has to be.”

“Fine. Let’s try best case then Mr. Hypothetical Scenario, let’s say Louis likes me back and we get together. What about all those college guys? What happens when he meets someone really attractive and smart and it’s been a while since we’ve last seen each other? He’s already doing that now right? Hooking up with random hot guys and having hot one off sex.”

“Jesus that really drives you up the wall, doesn’t it?” Harry doesn’t feel like answering so he clenches his jaw and looks away “Anyway, Louis would never cheat on you alright? He’s more loyal than a golden retriever.”

Harry smiles at that, just barely, because it’s true.

“You’ve just gotta trust him. Put some faith into your guys’ relationship.”

“There is no relationship, Niall.” Harry sighs.

“Alright Harry,” Niall imitates Harry’s tired sigh “I just don’t want you to regret never saying anything.”

He won’t. He’s doing what’s best for him and Louis. He’s not taking chances and he’s playing it safe. It’s what’s right.

At least that’s what he tells himself later that night, staring at his computer screen longingly when his conversation with Niall won’t stop echoing in his mind as Louis rambles on happily (and very cutely) about how he finally managed to bump his grade up to an A in calculus

~•~

Harry has been staring at the last problem on his precalc midterm for the past twenty minutes. The words and numbers had started to blur together once Harry realized he and Louis were within a twenty-mile radius of each other. He’s trying so hard to focus but this is his last midterm for the day and according to the clock on the wall, it’s 2 ‘o clock. If Louis stayed true to his word, he should be rolling into town any minute.

“You have fifteen minutes to complete the test.” His teacher says but it’s distant to Harry.

More than half of the class is already gone by now, having finished and left during Harry’s mental shutdown. Harry’s only got one more problem to go and of course the last one just happens to also be the hardest and longest one. If he wants time to finish it and check it, he needs to get to work now.

He’ll do it. If only because the sooner he finishes, the sooner he can go to Louis’ house to meet him there.

The next ten minutes are a blur of a yellow pencil scribbling grey against a white page. After Harry gets his answer, he’s asked to explain his reasoning and he’s pretty sure he’s going to get this part wrong because he’s been bullshitting since the second sentence. But what’s done is done so he dots the last line and jumps out of his seat, startling the remaining few students, gathers all his papers in his hand, and staples them together sloppily before slapping it on the teacher’s desk.

He knows everyone is watching him as swings his backpack over his shoulders but he doesn’t care.

The bell rings to say their time is up. His teacher yells after him to have a good winter break and to be safe but he can’t bring himself to shout back, too anxious to get out of there.

He’s jogging to his car almost slipping on ice and snow. It’s cold and his hands tremble with it as he unlocks his car door but he’s late and Louis is already home.

~•~

Nervous sweat slicks up Harry’s palms and makes it so damn hard to parallel park on the sidewalk that outlines Louis’ house. There’s nothing to be nervous about really, Harry had just talked to Louis last night and they had come up with a plan so that Louis would arrive just as Harry was getting out of school. Everything had been fine over the phone, Harry could tell that Louis was excited to see him, probably not to the extent Harry was though. And it’s only his best friend, the person who knows him inside and out, but it’s also the person he’s completely infatuated with.

So this is it, Harry takes a deep breath and switches off the ignition replacing the hum of his car with a ringing in his ears. He gets out and takes slow steps partly to stall but mostly so he doesn’t slip on ice. There’s a little homemade wreath hanging on the red door that looks like it was made by some pretty crafty twins. Snow coats everything in the front lawn but aside from that, not much has changed since Harry last visited in August. He’s tried to convince himself to visit between then and now but it would’ve been too weird without Louis there.

Before he can knock on the door he needs to shake the snowflakes out of his hair and maybe he should text his mom really quick to let her know he’s at Louis’ now and while he’s at it he could probably tell Niall about the little verse he came up with in his head while procrastinating on his World History midterm. He’s definitely not stalling, no, just-

“Harry Styles, why is it taking you five minutes to get your ass out of the freezing cold and come hug your best friend who you haven’t seen in months?” A sharp voice makes Harry’s head jerk up from where it was hung staring at his phone.

And Louis’ right in front of him. Not in pixels. Not trapped behind a screen. But physically right there radiating his warmth and brightness so that Harry feels recharged and energized in a way he hasn’t felt in months.

“Lou.” He says because a proper greeting escapes him when he’s processing the fact that Louis is completely unchanged and still just as gorgeous. He steps forward and sort of wraps himself around Louis while simultaneously collapsing onto the other. Louis stumbles a bit before regaining his footing and wrapping his arms around Harry too so the last few parts of them that weren’t touching before are now. They’re pressed up against each other completely and Harry’s freezing but Louis holds him close and doesn’t complain.

“Hi.” Louis giggles into his neck and it’s such a great feeling that it sends a shiver down Harry’s spine. It pricks goosebumps into his skin that Louis mistakes as a sign of him being cold.

“Come in, jeez Harry you shouldn’t have stood out there so long, weirdo.” He lets go to maneuver around Harry and close the door then takes him by the wrist and pulls him into the living room which is toasty and cozy and smells like Christmas.

“Were you watching me then?” Harry beams and removes his coat which he tosses over the couch before collapsing on it.

Louis scoffs and Harry could just hear the _makes yourself at home then_ that goes unsaid while he replies to Harry’s comment, “Well someone had to keep lookout to warn the others when the complete threat about to enter our house arrived.”

“I’m harmless.” Harry deadpans and watches Louis take a seat on the other side of the couch, much too far away in Harry’s opinion.

“Far from it actually. You steal our food, tell lame jokes, stumble around with your clumsy limbs, you’re dangerous,” Harry laughs loudly and openly before pulling Louis into his side. There’s no need for distance, there has been plenty of distance between the two of them for long enough “And you cuddle too much.” Louis says, muffled by the fabric of Harry’s sweater.

“Just missed you is all.” Harry mumbles and pulls Louis a little closer.

It’s a little scary to say that with so much admiration while bringing Louis closer when he could easily pull away.

But he doesn’t pull away and Harry beams when Louis says, “Missed you too curly.” and noses at the curly strands of hair near Harry’s ear.

Harry doesn’t feel vulnerable anymore, he feels invincible. He’s got this urge that tugs on his heart and the truth feels like it’s trying to push past the seam of his lips. It’s just that everything is so effortless with Louis and all the worry Harry has just disappears when he’s around him. Maybe telling Louis how he feels wouldn’t be the end of the world.

But it’s not the right time because before they can get too comfortable, there’s a rumble of little voices and the pitter of patter of light, quick footsteps.

“Mom’s home with the kids.” Louis says almost in warning just seconds before seven people burst through the door.  

“Louis!” They exclaim and rip him away from Harry, climbing all over him and pressing kisses into his cheeks.

Harry thinks he would do just the same if he could.

“Hello boys!” Jay chirps as she waltzes into the room, a baby on each arm.

Louis must have already seen them earlier because he’s not tripping over himself to take them out of their car seats and hold one in each arm to ogle at both of them and murmur about how nice it is to have another boy in the house.

Harry gets up and rushes over to Jay where she’s struggling with the weight of both of the car seats, “Here, let me help you.” He offers and takes Doris, the little baby girl.

“Thank you sweetheart.” She smiles at him gratefully before setting the car seat down and taking Ernest out.

Harry follows and carefully unbuckles Doris, taking her little arms and legs out of the straps. He remembers to support her neck as he slowly picks her up. He was quite the pro at holding babies before Louis left and it’s nice to know he hasn’t forgotten anything while he’s been away for so long.

“Harry, honey, you can just put her in her bouncy seat.” She motions to where Ernest is sitting in his, then she makes her way into the kitchen calling for Daisy and Phoebe to come get a snack.

Harry does as he’s told. Finding his way back to Louis’ side on the couch afterwards, where’s he got an arm around Lottie who’s sitting on his other side and is laughing at something Fizzy has just said that Harry couldn’t catch.

“We knew Harry would show up as soon as Louis got back.” Lottie teases and cranes her neck to look at him around Louis.

Harry can’t really say much to that so he focuses mostly on controlling the rosiness of his cheeks.

“Stop it..” Louis jokingly chides while cupping a hand over her mouth.

She just laughs and pushes him away.

It’s not until later when they’re all sitting around the dinner table that Harry’s absence the past four months is brought up again.

“We haven’t seen you in a while Harry, what have you been up to?” Jay says, looking directly at Harry while cutting up Daisy’s chicken. Harry’s always wondered how moms were so good at multitasking, like for instance now: Jay was guilting Harry while staring directly at him and preparing her daughter’s food.

Harry squirms a little in his seat and tries to come up with a good answer, “Um-”

“Louis still sees him! Louis told me they skip on the computer!” Phoebe chirps.

“It’s Skype.” Fizzy corrects, laughing.

Harry turns to Louis and mumbles low enough so that no one else can hear, “How does she know that?”

Louis shrugs, a little pink dusting his cheeks and he looks so pretty flushed that Harry has to clear his throat and squirm in his chair some more.

“I don’t blame him for not coming around while I was gone. The only other boy in this house can’t even talk.” Louis saves Harry to which he’s extremely grateful for.

“Well I’m disappointed. I thought for sure it was me he was always around for.” Lottie deadpans with a faint smirk, looking so much like Louis that way.

Louis gives her a disapproving look and Harry just giggles awkwardly because what else can he do really?

It’s just that he wasn’t sure he could handle coming to the Tomlinson household where it would be so much quieter without Louis’ loud voice and constant havoc. He would only be reminded that much more of Louis’ already blaring obvious absence and he didn’t want to do that to himself.

But it’s fine now. He’s got Louis by his side trying to feed his baby siblings peas while his mother chastises him and everything feels normal again.

~•~

They’re in Louis’ room now. A place Harry’s come to miss quite a lot considering he hasn’t been there in a while, a change from when he used to be here almost every day. They lie on their backs staring up at the ceiling, so close to each other but untouching.

The two of them have been talking nonstop for almost two hours and now there’s finally a lull in the conversation. It makes Harry realize how late it’s getting and it’s the reason he remembers he still has to take two more midterms tomorrow.

“It’s getting late,” His voice sounds weird interrupting the peaceful silence they had just barely succumbed to “I should probably, like, go home.”

Harry doesn’t want to go home is the thing, he’d much rather stay the night here with Louis and wrap himself around the other while they sleep but there’s this thing called getting an education Harry really wishes he cared less about.

“Well if you insist.” Louis sighs and turns his head so he’s looking at Harry.

Harry’s too afraid to turn his own head, knowing the closeness of their faces would give him the courage to do something really stupid.

He sits up instead and looks back at Louis lying down (which might have been a really bad idea because his sweater is riding up his stomach so the golden skin, even in winter, of his hip is revealed and he’s got a quiet smile on his face, the one of pure adoration Harry swears is only for him), “Walk me to the door?” He manages to force out, sounding normal and level.

Louis groans but heaves himself up out of bed anyway, gesturing for Harry to lead the way.

“I’m happy I got to see you in person again finally. I think you’ve grown since the last time and a webcam doesn’t show that kind of stuff.” Louis says, which yeah, Harry did have a little growth spurt of about .5 inches but it’s cute Louis noticed something so minimal “You get out of school at noon tomorrow right?”

Harry nods.

“Good then I expect you to be here at twelve-ten and not a moment later.” Louis demands, poking Harry’s chest.

“Yes sir.” Harry giggles and grabs Louis’ hand, holding it in place on his chest.

“Bye Harry.” Louis laughs while pulling Harry into a hug.

He smells like laundry detergent, Harry notes, like the chicken alfredo they had for dinner earlier and vanilla. The smell of his house has already attached to him in the few hours he’s been here.

“Bye Lou.” Harry calls over his shoulder as he walks out into the winter night that makes him shrivel up in his coat and illuminates his breath in the yellow glow of the street lights. The snow shimmers in rainbows, reflecting an array of colors coming from the Christmas lights strung across houses.

Harry wants to bask in this feeling forever, wants to bottle it up in a mason jar that way he can remember how warm he felt coming from the arms of the boy he’s in love with in the midst of a freezing winter night. 

~•~

“Thank you for helping with the dishes honey, you know you don’t have to do that.” Jay ruffles Harry’s hair on her way to put the leftovers in the fridge.

“You’re welcome.” He chirps.

He felt like he sort of owed her for letting him stay for dinner two nights in a row. Plus it was obvious Louis wouldn’t be much help since he’s been smiling and giggling at his phone ever since Harry got here. He’s not jealous and he’s not jumping to conclusions either but he really wants to know who’s responsible for making Louis overly giddy.

Jay looks over at Louis, shakes her head, and murmurs “That boy.”

The standard marimba ringtone cuts through the air only to be stopped after the first ring, replaced with Louis’ voice crooning hello down the phone. Harry’s heart sinks down to his stomach while he watches Louis sneak up stairs with his phone stuck to his ear, his tone soft and flirty.

“You have geography this year right?” Jay says, head in the fridge as she shuffles around tupperware in there.

Harry hums a yes, staring at the staircase where Louis had just disappeared.

“How are you liking that teacher? You know how I feel about him.” She tuts.

“Um, he hasn’t said much to me really,” Harry forgets what he was saying when he hears Louis’ laugh through the thin walls.

“Well you let me know if he causes you any trouble. I have no problem marching in there again and telling him how much of an ass he is.” She closes the refrigerator and walks out of the kitchen with two bottles in her hand.

Which yeah, he’s the teacher who told Louis he would never amount to anything. At first Louis had just laughed it off but Harry will never forget getting a call in the middle of the night, staying up until two in the morning trying to stop Louis’ sniffles on the other end.

So naturally, Harry hates his geography teacher quite a bit but not as much as he hates the jealousy that twists his stomach and makes him want to hide in the suds of soapy dishwater.

Louis still hasn’t come downstairs by the time Harry’s done washing the dishes so he moves on to drying them. And it’s not until Harry’s picked up the second to last plate to dry it that Louis finally reappears.

“Sorry about that.” Louis scratches the back of his neck awkwardly.

“It’s fine.” Harry shrugs and plasters a fake smile on his lips.

That’s all they say about that and it’s fine, Harry won’t let it get to him.

~•~

It’s starting to get to Harry.

He had been doing good, had just ignored the glow of Louis’ phone while they tried to watch Home Alone with the lights off. He had patiently repeated himself for the third time when Louis had been too wrapped up in a text to hear him correctly.

But now it’s just starting to get annoying and Harry’s itching to ask who could be so important on the other end of his texts.

If he wasn’t so irritated he probably would have been too scared to ask but as things are now, he just wants it to stop.

“So Louis, who have you been talking to all day?” He demands.

Louis looks up at him, “What?”

Harry boils with frustration but Louis only laughs, “I’m just kidding Harry I heard you. He’s just this guy I met in my Classic Lit class.”

“What did you, like, ask to borrow a pencil and he gave you his number instead?” Harry knows he sounds bitter but he couldn’t help it if he tried.

“Uh, actually he’s a fifth year. He’s getting his masters now and he was a TA for my professor in Lit.” Louis shuffles his phone back and forth in both hands.

Harry takes a deep breath and tries to remain calm, “How old is he?”

“Twenty-three.” Louis shrugs.

He makes this all seem like it’s not a big deal but to Harry it is. To Harry it’s a very big deal that Louis is dating older guys who are smarter and hotter and more experienced than Harry.

“That’s a little old, don’t you think?” Harry asks rhetorically.

Louis gives him a pointed look and retorts, “I don’t actually.”

Five years isn’t that much especially in college, Harry knows that but a moment ago it seemed like a valid point that would make Louis rethink this whole thing.

“Greg- that’s his name by the way thank you very much for asking- is really nice so you don’t have anything to worry about.” Louis punches Harry lightly in the shoulder.

It’s not that Harry’s worried but he nods like he understands because he doesn’t want to fight. At least it doesn’t sound too serious and if it was then it would be all Harry’s fault for not telling Louis how he felt sooner.

~•~

 “Louis!” An elated Niall shouts as he hops into Louis’ arms.

Harry laughs while Louis tries to manage looking annoyed even as he hugs Niall back just as tightly.

“Missed you bro!” Niall hangs his arm around Louis’ shoulders.

Once he’s out of the way Liam shuffles inside and steals a hug, Zayn trailing not far behind only giving Louis’ hair a little ruffle. Apparently he’s good on his Louis fix since he lives with him and they just saw each other a couple days ago when Louis drove them home.

The three of them discard their snow dusted coats and follow Harry and Louis to the basement. Harry has to hold down his excitement of having all of them back together again. They used to get together in Harry’s basement at least once a week before Zayn and Louis graduated. Harry has kept the tradition going with Niall and Liam but it isn’t the same. Now he feels completely at ease as they settle on his worn down couch and Louis puts on FIFA.

The game just serves as background noise though as they catch up and exchange stories. Harry thinks maybe it should be weird since they’re all at different points in their life but they’re still the same people even if their stories have names Harry can’t match a face to now. The fireplace crackles and hums while snow tumbles and blows around outside. Louis’ got his knee pressed into Harry’s thigh and Harry feels a sense of comfort and warmth only times like these can bring. 

“I’m hungry.” Louis grumbles a little while later after Liam finishes his story about- honestly Harry couldn’t tell you what it was about, he’s was too preoccupied watching Louis’ eyes light up and reflect the Christmas lights strung all around the room.

“Go get us food then.” Niall throws a square pillow from the love seat at him. But of course he misses and it hits Harry.

Louis grabs it and throws it back at Niall laughing and running upstairs after it hits Niall square in the face.

“No one messes with Harry when Louis’ around.” Zayn smirks.

“I don’t see what you see in him.” Niall groans and touches his forehead where the zipper of the pillow has left a red mark.

“I don’t either,” Zayn muses “Maybe you should write a list and share it with us when Louis gets back.”

“That’s a great idea Zayn!” Liam chimes in.

Harry wishes they would stop mocking him.

“That’s the perfect way to tell him how you feel.” Niall agrees because two against one wasn’t enough and he had to make it three.

“Whatever, even if I wanted to I couldn’t. He’s got a boyfriend now.” Harry rolls his eyes and pretends he’s more annoyed than he is jealous.

“Wait what?”

“Really?”

Niall and Liam say simultaneously and this time they’re not playing stupid.

“Yeah some twenty-three year old he met in his classic lit class-”

“Are you talking about Greg?” Zayn interjects.

And the confused look he gives Harry makes him second guess himself, “Yeah?”

“That’s not his boyfriend.” Zayn laughs and keeps laughing until Louis’ trudging down the stairs with a bag of chips in his hands.

“What’s so funny?” He raises his eyebrow before stuffing his mouth with a large chip.

Niall rips the bag out of his hands. Louis kicks him for it but he doesn’t fight much harder to get it back.

“Nothing.” Zayn sighs to try and catch his breath after laughing so long and hard.

And, yeah, it’s great to have everyone back together again.

~•~

 “And that takes care of Liam and Zayn.” Louis smiles as the cashier wearily hands them a plastic bag containing various flavors of lube. “Niall says he’ll take care of the condoms. Speaking of, we still need to get him a present.”

“No, you need to get him a present. I already did.” Harry smiles self-satisfied.

He found an Eagles record on vinyl at a record store when his family had gone to the city to drop Gemma off at college. He’d wanted to keep it for himself but Niall’s dad has a record player unlike Harry and in reality Niall’s probably a bigger fan of them (not that Harry will admit that to him though).

“Can’t you just say it was from the both of us?” Louis pleads.

“Nope sorry.” Harry stays firm on his answer which is no easy feat when Louis’ pouting adorably.

“Fine.” Louis sighs.

In the end Louis gets Songwriting for Dummies for Niall because he’s a little shit and he knows that Niall will laugh at it and thank him anyway.

They decide to wrap up their shopping trip after that’s taken care of and go back to Louis’ because the only presents they had left to get were the ones for each other. Harry still had no idea what to get Louis. He was still trying to figure out what kind of gift says “I’m so thankful that you’re my best friend but I still want more than that”. He’ll think of something eventually.

As soon as the door opens to Louis’ home, Harry’s hit by sacred warm air and the smell of cinnamon that wafts up whenever Jay is baking and a chorus of “Harry!” ringing from tiny voices. As soon as he gets two feet in the door, two little girls attach themselves to his legs and look up at him, pleading.

“Their older brother is home from college and they still can’t be bothered to pay attention to anyone other than you, Harold.” Louis tisks as he hangs up his coat on the hook by the door.

Harry laughs and blushes when Louis mutters, “Can’t blame them really” and sashays off to the kitchen probably to harass his mom while she tries to bake.

“We would ask Louis for help-”

“-But he can’t bake!”

“We want to make a gingerbread house!”

“Will you help us?”

The twins throw questions at him while he shrugs off his coat and scarf.

“I’d love to help you guys! But I don’t know if I could bake the pieces for the gingerbread house,” He drops his voice as he drops down to their level, squatting so he’s eye level with them “Don’t tell anyone that I admitted my baking skill weren’t adequate enough though.”

“What does adakit mean?” Daisy’s face scrunches with confusion.

“You don’t need to bake it! Mom bought the gingerbread pieces but we need your help putting it together!” Phoebe explains, very enthusiastic and very loud.

“That I can definitely help with.” Harry stands up only getting time to take his boots off before the girls squeal and pull him by the arms into the kitchen. It’s a wonderful disaster currently. There’s various baking ingredients smeared and spilt across the counter but on top of the kitchen island lays two sheets of perfectly round sugar and cinnamon cookies. Louis keeps trying to sneak one but each time his mom smacks his hand away and tells him to wait until they’ve cooled.

The twins and Harry come barreling in so that they only add to the chaotic kitchen. It should be overwhelming maybe, but Harry just feels like he’s right at home. Especially when Louis sees him walk in holding hands with the girls and sends Harry that special smile reserved only for him.

“He said yes mom!”

“Can we open the box now?!”

Jay lays a hand on the tops of their heads and they calm down immediately, looking up at her and waiting for an answer.

“Yes girls and make sure to thank Harry for agreeing to help with you.”

They thank him, much calmer now, and each of them grab a hand leading him to the dining room table.

Jay brings out the pieces along with everything else that comes to assemble it, lays it on the table, and sends Harry a sweet, grateful smile before leaving them to their own.

Contrary to before, the girls are settled and very focused on dressing their gingerpeople with frosting and candies. Harry’s gluing the structure together using only icing and a steady hand when a very entitled Louis waltzes into the room.

“And how come I wasn’t asked to be a part of this? You girls do know that I am your older brother and curly here isn’t right?” He frowns at them with his hands on his hips but they just giggle at him.

“You wouldn’t be any help Lou!”

“Yeah you’d mess it all up!”

Louis makes an indignant sound, “Well alright then.”

He collapses in the chair next to Harry and leans in, his face studying Harry’s hard work closely.

“I’m mad at you for siding with them by the way.” He says casually.

“We both know they’re right.” Harry answers, never taking his eyes away from the house as he carefully puts together the foundation.

“Fine, but that doesn’t mean you couldn’t have invited me to distract you and eat all the leftover candy.”

Harry cautiously takes his hands off the gingerbread, only turning to look at Louis and smile when it doesn’t fall, “You’re right. You can do that now.”

“That’s the plan.” Louis smirks at him and grabs a handful of gumdrops before popping one into his mouth. Harry wants to feed him those gumdrops. He wants to kiss Louis knowing he’ll just taste like grape flavored gumdrops which have never been his favorite flavor, but they might just be coming from Louis’ tongue.

“Harry, do you like my gingerwoman?” Daisy’s voice brings his attention back to the task at hand.

He glances over and sees a sloppy but very cute looking gingerwoman, “It’s lovely Daisy.” 

She smiles down at it and then promptly bites its leg off.

“Tastes good too.” She says through a mouthful.

Harry chuckles at her similarity to her brother who breaks a piece off of the roof right after.

The foundation falls and Harry can’t find it in his heart to be all that mad when he has to rebuild it.

~•~

Somehow they make it through Louis’ distractions and the heart attacks he gave Harry each time he pretended to break off another piece from the house. It turns out pretty cute, honestly. The parts done by Harry look meticulously crafted while the parts done by the twins give it some character.

The girls have gone off to bed and if the way Harry keeps yawning as he dips his cookies into his milk is any indication, he’d say it’s almost his bedtime too.

“I think I should probably head home.” Harry says once he’s finished with his cookies.

Louis picks it up and walks to the sink, “You can stay here if you’d like. It won’t be much fun driving this late at night in the snow.”

“I would but I promised Gemma I’d go shopping for mom and Robin’s presents with her tomorrow morning.” He stands, inhales the sweet smell of baked goods one last time, and walks to the door with Louis trailing behind him.

“Okay only if you’re sure, but text me when you get home alright?” Multicolored Christmas lights shine through his hair, creating a halo and a soft glow all around him as he speaks, a soft, cautious grin on his lips while he looks at Harry.

He thinks that if they were dating, this would be when he would kiss Louis goodnight, loving and lasting like how this night feels.

“I will.” He settles for a quick hug instead. The content feeling he gets from being in Louis’ arms for only a split second stays as they part and burns out slowly.  

“Hey, thanks for helping the girls tonight.” Louis says, leaning against the door with his arms crossed while Harry backs up out on the porch.

“Of course, anytime Lou.” Harry grins at him one last time before turning around to walk down the steps.

“That’s why you’re my favorite!” Louis calls and it echoes through the barren winter night trapped in white snow that falls in sheets on the ground and manages to cover every inch of Harry when he treks through it.

A moment later he hears the front door shut and then it’s eerily quiet. His only company is the yellow glow from the street light that illuminates snowflakes and his little car parked so that it hugs the sidewalk.  

Harry can’t stop smiling: he’s Louis’s favorite. 

~•~

“Okay so this Greg, how hot is he?” Harry’s draped across the couch backwards, back where his legs should be and legs where his back should be. It’s how he likes to sit when he’s frustrated and restless which is how the Louis-and-cooler-older-fifth-year-Greg situation makes him feel currently.

Zayn shrugs, attention focused on the FIFA game in front of him, “I don’t know if he’s hot. But he’s like cute I guess and he’s tall.”

“Zayn doesn’t think anyone’s hot unless they’re Liam.” Niall comments and scores a goal.

“I can’t say you’re wrong Niall.” Zayn pushes some random buttons on the controller completely unphased by the fact that he’s losing horribly.

“Thanks babe!” Liam calls from the recliner he’s splayed out on, thumbing through something on his phone.

Harry groans, turns right side up, and halfheartedly punches a couch pillow, “None of you are any help.”

“We’re going to tell you the same thing we always do,” Zayn pauses and steals the ball from Niall on screen “The fact that Greg is hot or not doesn’t change that.”

“Just tell Louis how you feel already!” Niall shouts.

“It’s almost Christmas. It’s the perfect time for confessing your true love to someone.” Liam adds.

“Not when that someone is your best friend and might have a boyfriend.” Harry chimes.

“We know you like a challenge!” Niall chimes right back.

The door opens then, blowing in cold air and snow that makes each boy whine simultaneously.

“Sorry I’m late!” Louis chirps “My mom needed help with the babies.”

“You haven’t missed much.” Harry grumbles.

Louis takes the spot on the couch next to him and ruffles his hair with cold hands that make him shiver as soon as they touch his scalp, “Awe, are they not letting you play again Harold?”

“Louis! You’re on my team against these two.” Niall nods to Liam who’s practically sat in Zayn’s lap trying to help him but really just distracting him.

Harry rolls his eyes even though it’s one of the cutest things he’s ever seen.

“Yeah alright. Harry can be our cheerleader.” Louis stands and pats Harry’s knee as he moves to sit on the floor beside Niall.

Harry’s not cheering for anyone while they play this game, he’s just going to lay back instead. It’s pointless in his mind except for the fact that Louis is kind of cute when he gets focused and competitive. It’s a little hot too, honestly.

Oh God he’s doing that thing again. Pining after Louis for the weirdest, randomest things and now it’s starting to get beyond irritating how everything about this boy is so hopelessly endearing. It’s another reason upon reasons of why he should really grow up and tell him how feels. And Liam’s right; it’s Christmas. And Harry’s a bit of a hopeless romantic, he thinks that it would be perfect to tell Louis how he feels while soothing Christmas plays in the background before they’ll look up to see mistletoe conveniently placed above them. It’d be the perfect, cliché happy little ending Harry’s been yearning for ever since his crush on Louis developed. So, that being first day he met him.

Christmas isn’t for another week though so there isn’t very much mistletoe hanging around. Louis’ birthday is in six days, however it would probably be a bit self-conceited to say admitting to the other that he’s in love with him is a good birthday present.

Louis’ just scored a goal. Zayn and Liam can’t be bothered to do more than give each other a consolatory kiss. Niall throws his fists in the air and shouts. Louis jumps on top of Harry pressing him into the couch, shouting along with Niall.

It’s ridiculous honestly but Harry is laughing for some reason, so hard he can’t breathe. Or maybe it’s because Louis’ weight is crushing his ribs in.

“You’re my little cheerleader!” Louis beams at him.

Harry doesn’t mention the fact that he hasn’t said anything the past ten minutes they’ve been playing.

He also decides not to complain when Louis tucks himself between Harry and the couch because he claims Harry is his good luck charm.

He does however think about Louis’ thighs pressed against his long after they’ve all gone, drowning his pity with spiked hot chocolate and lovely, sappy, feel-good Christmas movies.

~•~

 “Harry, it’s three days until my birthday and you still don’t know what you’re getting me. What kind of best friend are you?” Louis is stretched out on Harry’s bed currently as is Harry. His head leaning on Harry’s shoulder ever so lightly. It’s unnecessary really. His head is already supported by the pillows so it’s almost as if he’s pressed up against Harry just to touch him.

“You’re right, I’m really slacking. I’m sure Greg knows what he’s getting you by now.” Harry deadpans.

“Hey,” Louis cranes his neck to look at him “Don’t be like that.”

Harry wants to be a smart ass and retaliate with _what do you mean be like that?_ but he knows what he’s being like. He wants to argue that it’s true, that Louis has been finding more and more ways to slip how perfect the guy is into their conversations throwing off Harry every time so he stutters with jealousy after. He doesn’t say anything like that though, if only to stop Louis from getting mad at him.

“I’m throwing you a party here. Isn’t that a good enough present?” Harry demands.

Louis hums, pondering it for a moment before saying, “If there’s alcohol then yes, it can count for my birthday present.”

“Of course there will be. It’s your nineteenth birthday and even though that doesn’t entitle you to any more than your eighteenth did, I say it’d be wrong not to celebrate it properly.”

“It’s settled then,” Louis lays his hand lightly on Harry’s forearm “You’re buying me booze for my birthday.”

He never moves his hand and Harry thinks Louis is probably the most confusing person on this earth. He has all these soft touches, soft looks, soft words that make Harry’s heart melt. The cuddling has always been a constant in their friendship seeing they’re just both tactile people, only recently it seems like there’s intent behind every one of Louis’ touches. At least it feels like that, but he’s probably just making all this up in his head in hopes that he’s not the only one completely in for it here.

Harry craves more though. He wants to know what exactly every touch means, he wants to know what it’d feel like to have Louis’ lips moving against his, he wants to know what Louis would do if he took his hand in his and kissed his knuckles. The urge to find out pounds in his heart and through his veins, leaks through his fingertips when he brushes them against Louis’ arm or hair- anything he can get away with without coming on too strong.

He’s tired of dancing around his feelings and if there really was something there for Louis too, Harry thinks he’s the type to have already done something about it.

And he’s knows he’s not the most discreet person ever. Louis’ had to notice the hearts in Harry’s eyes whenever they look at each other. There’s a reason why he hasn’t addressed Harry about it, and it’s the same reason why Harry won’t be addressing him about it anytime soon either; there’s just nothing coming from Louis’ end.

There’s only soft touches, soft looks, soft words, and that’s enough for now. The thrill of not knowing will get Harry by until the itch of curiosity will become much that he’ll have to scratch it and he’ll have to find out.

“What are you thinking about Harold?” Louis punches his forearm with the hand that was rested on it before tucking his back in between them.

“If you prefer tequila or vodka.” Harry lies.

“Smirnoff and whipped cream, Harry. That’s where it’s at.”

~•~

Mariah Carey is belting out about how all she wants for Christmas is you and it’s probably the one hundred and tenth time Harry has heard this song in the past month, but somehow it’s still not getting old.

He’s just finished strategically placing the bottles of alcohol so that if his parents come down to the basement they can be easily hidden. Now he stands, looking around, admiring his hard work. It’s not like there’s going to be a ton of people there for Louis’ party tonight (just Liam, Zayn, and Niall), but he still went ahead and decorated. He found the last of the Christmas lights they had lying around and hung them across the ceiling. He put out all of Louis’ favorite foods, including the cupcakes he claims are the best thing Harry knows and will ever know how to bake. And there’s a playlist made up of Christmas music, their favorite songs as a collective group, and songs that remind him specifically of Louis no one has to know about playing in the background.

He didn’t have to do all of this really, the alcohol was enough, but it’s Louis’ birthday and he wants to make him the happiest boy on the planet for his special day.

“Merry Christmas Eve!” Niall yells as he stomps down the stairs, pulling Harry into a one armed hug “Holy shit, that’s quite the collection you’ve got there.”

“Say that a little louder.” Harry deadpans.

“Why’ve you got so much smirnoff? Jesus.”

“Just cause.” Harry grumbles and makes a note to bring out the whipped cream once Louis arrives.

Niall grabs a beer and cracks it open, plopping down on the couch, “This is a nice little set up,” He takes a huge gulp from his drink “Tonight’s the night Harry I can feel it.”

“What are you talking about?” Harry scoffs and helps himself to his own beer, joining Niall on the couch.

“Tonight is the night you’re going to tell Louis how you feel.”

“Niall no-”

“Niall yes,” He insists “Trust me, I always get really prophetical around Christmas time.” He takes another sip and sighs contently “Ah, I can’t wait to be wasted in a couple hours.”

Niall is officially the weirdest person Harry’s ever known.

“Sorry we’re late.” Zayn’s voice calls out over the music as two sets of footsteps thump down the stairs.

“It’s fine.” Harry responds, watching as they make their way over to the alcohol deciding to share the only bottle of tequila there and chase it with a coke.

They’re both going to be sloppy and touchy-feely by the time it’s gone. Maybe Harry should tell them to drink something else but figures they won’t be hurting anyone besides his own lonely heart.

Harry hears the front door upstairs open and shut. It has to be Louis.

“Maybe we should turn off the lights and hide that way he’ll think there’s more people here than just us.” Zayn smirks.

“Yeah why the hell is it only us? It’s Louis’ birthday he should be celebrating with the whole town!” Niall exclaims and crushes his now empty beer can in his fist, already well on his way to getting very, very drunk.

“Me and Gemma are throwing a party on New Years and Louis’ decided he’ll have more than enough time to catch up with everyone there,” Harry defends “He wanted it to be just us.”

“The birthday boy has arrived!” Louis hollers as he prances down the stairs and jumps to skip that last couple of steps.

A chorus of happy birthdays is shouted his way while they all crowd around him and hug him, patting him on the back. 

“Thank you, thank you.” He says once the others, aside from Harry, step back and go about their own (drinking) business again.

Harry stands there with his arm around Louis’ shoulder and Louis’ arm around his waist.

“Thank you so much for all of this H.” Louis smiles at the side of Harry’s head.

Harry can see the fond look Louis is giving him out of the corner of his eye and decides it’s probably for the best he doesn’t turn to face him otherwise he might just kiss him.

“Now come, let’s get fantastically wasted.” Louis pulls him by the hand and he follows.

~•~

 “Happy birthday dear Louis! Happy Birthday to you!” The four of them finish singing to the birthday boy. Zayn holds a cupcake up to his face so he can blow out the single candle they’ve stuck in the middle of it.

“Make a wish!” Zayn laughs and shoves it so close to Louis’ face, he goes cross eyed.

Everyone loses their shit at that and, yeah, it’s safe to say they’re all way past a happy little buzz and now on a wild drunken haze. Louis closes his eyes and blows out the candle. They cheer, Harry pulls the candle out, and Zayn decides to then shove the red velvet, cream cheese frosted cupcake into Louis’ face. Niall laughs so hard his reindeer antler headband falls off (he’d found it sometime during the night and has kept on his head since then).

“This is going to stain my shirt you shit!” Louis shouts and tries to wipe the frosting and cake off with fumbling hands.

“No,” Harry breathes through laughter “Come on I’ll help you.”

He takes Louis hand and tries not crack up all over again about the crumbs falling off Louis’ face Harry’s too drunk to clean up at the moment. He hushes Louis while they walk through the house until they get to the kitchen. Thankfully his other family members are asleep and he doesn’t have to hide the way he fumbles for the light switch and trips over his own feet as he stumbles to the sink, slurring for Louis to get up on the counter.

He wets a rag with cold water, rings it out, and brings it up to Louis’ chest where there are bits of frosting and cake still stuck to his shirt. He carefully dabs at them until they come off.

“It tasted pretty good from what I could tell of the part that got shoved in my mouth.” Louis beams at him.

“Thanks.” Harry giggles and wets the rag with warm water this time so he can wipe down Louis’ face and get the bits stuck in his hair.

Harry looks everywhere but Louis’ eyes that are so blue right now, electrified by Smirnoff and good times. He tries not to let his fingers tremble as they stroke Louis’ cheek and comb through his hair.

He rinses and rings the rag out when he’s done, hanging it over the faucet to dry.

“Thank you very much Harold. You’re a life saver.” Louis grabs Harry’s shoulders and forces the other to look at him.

They’re faces are perfectly level and it’s a lot to take in. It’s almost too much to handle.

“Um,” Harry hesitates. Louis blinks at him, smile never falling or losing its brightness “God Louis you’re gorgeous.”

Louis giggles, “Could say the same about you.”

Harry’s cheeks turn even more flushed, already rosy red from the alcohol he’s had tonight.

Louis doesn’t move, doesn’t even seem phased, when Harry parts his legs so he can stand in between them and hold Louis’ waist.  

“I really want to kiss you.” Harry whispers.

“Then please do.” Louis breathes and locks his legs around Harry.

Not surprisingly, it’s the sweetest kiss Harry’s ever had. He can taste whipped cream and red velvet cake and sugary frosting all on Louis’ tongue. But it’s not just that; it’s how long he’s wanted this and how good it feels. It’s how Louis pulls him closer and kisses him deeper making Harry feel like he’s going to fill up with all these warm feelings and float away.

“I’ve wanted this for so long.” Harry breathes after they stop kissing but haven’t pulled away from each other quite yet.

“Me too.” Louis nods eagerly and goes back in for more before Harry can ask him to elaborate.

Louis licks into his mouth and bites at his lip; it’s so lovely and so arousing all Harry can do is try to kiss back with just as much determination. Louis’ fingers thread through Harry’s hair and pull down just slightly so Harry’s head is tilted up and Louis can kiss him as deep as he wants. They’re pressed chest to chest now and Louis’ shirt is soaking Harry’s.

“Your shirt is all wet.” Harry chuckles.

Louis looks him in the eye, lips inches apart from his and says, “Take it off then.”

Oh, okay, yeah he can do that. Harry presses their lips back together and does as he’s told with fumbling fingers, slowly unbuttoning his shirt and pushing it off his shoulders.

He’s all golden skin and a little defined tummy Harry wants to bite and kiss.

Louis smirks knowing Harry is staring and is quite awed at the site in front of him. He’s just trying to take it all in. He’d never thought he would be kissing Louis, let alone taking his shirt off, in his kitchen while their three oblivious best friends get drunker downstairs and his family sleeps upstairs. 

“Want to let me borrow something of yours or are you just going to stare at me like that all night?” Louis teases and wraps his arms around Harry’s neck.

“I’ll tell you which one I’d rather do.” Harry grumbles and kisses Louis one more time before helping him off the counter and quietly up the stairs to his room.

Harry switches on the light and attempts to walk to his closet, only to be pulled down on the bed. He catches himself on his hands just before he crushes Louis. He doesn’t get to say much before Louis’ mouth is on his again.

It’s nice just to kiss for a while. To feel Louis’ lips move against his knowing now that it feels as right as he always thought it would. But there’s an expanse of Louis’ skin laid out before him he needs to explore with his mouth starting at his neck.

Louis gasps when Harry’s lips press feather light kisses down his jaw and neck to his collarbones then back up to his neck, nipping ever so slightly.

“Giving me a hickey the day before Christmas? That’s pretty scandalous Harry.” Louis still manages to sound teasing through moaning.

“I want you to remember this tomorrow.” Harry breaths, mouth moving against his skin so that it makes him shiver.

“I will.” Louis sounds completely earnest and he looks at Harry so sincere.

“This may not come as a surprise to you but,” Harry stares into Louis’ eyes, green and blue “I’m in love with you Louis.”

It’s not really the earth-shattering moment Harry’s always pictured. There’s no grand gesture, there’s no Christmas music and mistletoe, and they’re both still a little drunk.

Louis looks a little shocked, a little puzzled, a little weary, but a lot exhilarated. He kisses Harry and it’s not words, it’s not an “I love you too”, but it’s something.

“You’re drunk.” Harry says. He doesn’t say it like he’s worried but he is and it’s kind of a question, like he’s asking if this is all going to be a mistake to Louis tomorrow.

“Very. But that’s not why I’m kissing you.” Louis says and plays with the collar of Harry’s shirt.

“Then why are you?”

There’s a silence after while Louis ponders him for a moment. Harry studies his face, a million worries running through his mind that are only settled when Louis speaks up.

“Because I love you too and I think there’s a lot to say to each other tomorrow but right now I just really want to kiss you.” There’s a hint of neediness in his voice that makes Harry inhale sharply.

“Well it is your birthday…”

Louis nods.

“So I guess I have to give you what you want.” Harry smirks.

And so they do for a very long while. So long that Harry’s arms get tired of holding himself up and they have to switch so Louis is on top. There may be wondering hands after that but Harry can’t stop running his fingers over Louis’ soft skin (he has yet to put a shirt on) or squeezing Louis’ ass ever so slightly so that it makes Louis breathe a little heavier into Harry’s neck when they part.

They kiss for so long that Harry’s lips feel swollen and tingly when they finally do part, only so they can kick the others out, back to their own homes and families considering it’s past midnight and officially Christmas.

“Ah they’re back!” Liam exclaims and disturbs Zayn who was dozing off peacefully on his chest.

“Did you fix his shirt?” Niall slurs.

Harry looks down at Niall curled up on the floor, cuddling a bottle, and wearing reindeer antlers with jingle bells on them. One of the jingle bells has fallen off and he’s got it trapped in his fist.

Harry ignores his question, “Guys it’s pretty late and it’s kind of Christmas already so you should all probably get going.”

“He’s right.” Liam sighs.

“Liam carry me home.” Zayn groans and wraps himself around Liam.

“How are we supposed to get home?” Niall whines.

“Walk.” Harry deadpans the same time Liam says, “My sister’s on her way. She was the designated driver for her friends so she’s just going to pick us up on her way home.” This seems to be enough to content Niall.

And it’s a little weird when they all hesitate on their way out, eyeing Harry and Louis suspiciously once Louis says he’s just going to stay at Harry’s for the night. But they’re all still too drunk to really analyze it so they say goodbye and Merry Christmas before disappearing outside into the snow.

Harry unplugs the Christmas tree and takes Louis by the hand leading him up to his room so they can go to bed. It’s strange and really nice at the same time knowing that they’re going to fall asleep all wrapped up in each other.

At the back of Harry’s mind he’s worried. He’s worried about what will be said the next day, about where Louis really stands with Greg, about what his mom is going to say when she finds them sleeping together. But none of it matters when Louis shucks off his pants so all that he’s wearing are his boxers and one of Harry’s sweaters that fits himself perfectly but drowns Louis in cotton. It doesn’t matter when Louis crawls under the blankets with Harry and wraps his arms around Harry’s waist, nuzzling into Harry’s chest.

“Mind giving me a kiss goodnight?” Harry squeezes Louis’ shoulder until the other shuffles around in the dark and finds his lips, pressing a chaste closed mouth kiss to Harry’s lips and cheek and underneath his jaw.

“I love you.” Louis murmurs into Harry’s neck.

It’s weighted with so much reverence Harry has to hold Louis a little closer just so he can breathe properly.

“I love you too.” Harry whispers.

When Harry was younger he used to sneak downstairs in the middle of the night and quietly rip a little of the wrapping on one of his presents off to see what it was. He knew it was against the rules to peak but it was technically Christmas by that time anyway and he only ever did it with one present. After he was done he’d go back to his room and smile up at the ceiling so happy with whatever present he knew was getting until he fell asleep for a couple more hours.

He feels that way all over again now with Louis in his arms just moments after they’ve said I love you to each other.

 ~•~

A creak from his bedroom door is what wakes Harry up the next morning- Christmas morning. He forces one eye open, trying to focus his blurry vision on the figure standing in his doorway.

It’s his mom and her eyes widen knowingly when she sees Louis’ head peaking out from underneath the covers still buried into Harry’s chest. Harry’s not really sure what to do so he just pulls Louis a little closer, bracing himself before his mom scolds the both of them.

She only gives him another pointed look though and whispers, “Come down whenever you’re ready.” before shutting his door again.

Harry’s not really sure how he ever fell asleep last night. He’d been awake long enough for to feel his buzz wear off into a dull headache. It feels like he’s only been asleep for an hour but he’s wide awake, running on adrenaline. He’s buried under the covers with the boy he’s in love with and downstairs there’s family and presents and breakfast waiting for him. He’s never been happier and he knows there’s still a conversation that needs to happen between the two of them but he’s not nervous.

“Merry Christmas Harry.” Louis murmurs into Harry’s neck a few minutes later, voice quiet and rough.

It’s a sound Harry wants to listen to for the rest of his life knowing he’ll never get tired of it.

“Merry Christmas Lou.” Harry says back adoringly and holds Louis a little tighter.

He knows they should probably be hurrying downstairs but there’s no rush especially when Louis shuffles around so he’s laying on top of Harry, kissing the air out of him.

“I think you should probably know I’ve been in love with you for the past six months and there’s nothing serious going on between me and Greg. He’s just a distraction from you.” Louis admits, starring Harry intently.

“I’ve had a crush on you since I first met you,” Harry blushes “But last year I realized that the only reason I didn’t want you to graduate wasn’t just because you were my best friend, but also because I was really in love with you.”

“Was?”

“Am.”

There’s a pause while they just take each other in. Harry takes in Louis’ grey-blue eyes that still glimmer in his dark room, takes in Louis’ small hand playing with the curls behind Harry’s ear, Louis’ perfect, pink lips. He also takes in what Louis has just said and grins a little about the fact that maybe he hasn’t been the only one pining all this time.

“Um, so my mom kind of saw us sleeping together like ten minutes ago so we should probably go downstairs before she sends Gemma after us.” Harry chuckles, rubbing Louis’ sides with his hands.

“Right, yeah,” Louis gets out of bed then “Maybe I should put some pants on.”

“I’d prefer you didn’t.” Harry smirks, grabbing the hem of Louis’ sweater to keep him from getting away.

“But I’m sure everyone else in this house does and majority rules, babe.” Louis pads over to Harry’s dresser and rummages around looking for sweatpants or pajama pants, Harry’s not really sure- he’s trying to recover from Louis calling him babe for the first time since they’ve gotten together.

When they walk downstairs hand in hand, the Christmas tree is lighting up the room and it smells like bacon. Harry’s never felt this content before.

“There they are.” Anne smiles over her shoulder at them, hands busy frying bacon.

Robin says good-morning and side eyes them wearily for a moment. Harry doesn’t blame him though, he still can’t believe Louis is holding his hand and spending Christmas morning with him and his family.

Gemma scoffs at them, “Well I was right then. I’ve been calling this since he first brought you to meet us, Louis.”

“It was that obvious even back then?” Louis questions, staring up at Harry fondly and squeezing his hand.

“Yes,” She groans “It was disgusting watching him fall for you.”

Louis just beams at Harry while he shrugs. He’s not embarrassed of it anymore now that he knows the feeling is mutual- they’ve discussed it.

Once Gemma gets in her fix of teasing and just generally embarrassing Harry, breakfast goes perfectly. Harry never expected it to be awkward, not for one second. His family loves Louis and even if his mom is unhappy about them sleeping together she doesn’t bring it up thankfully- that would be more embarrassing than anything Gemma has said so far.

In a way it’s almost like any other morning Louis has stayed over and eaten breakfast with his whole family, only now he sits a little closer and tries to eat with one hand, the other always on Harry. Every time Louis touches Harry’s knee or arm or hair, he can feel himself beam down at his eggs and he can see Gemma rolling her eyes fondly. His mom fusses over them mostly saying over and over again how she knew this was bound to happen and she’s only surprised by the fact it didn’t happen earlier.

“Oh Louis you should have seen him the day he thought you were dating a boy last year,” Anne coos “He came home a mess, crying and-”

“Louis, you probably need to go home now right?” Harry interrupts, trying to hide how red his face is by taking a drink of his juice after.

Louis smiles at him knowingly, “Yes I probably should.”

“And I assume you’re going to go with him?” Anne asks Harry expectantly while she clears off the table.

Louis nods and squeezes his hand.

“Apparently.” Harry grins at Louis.

“That’s alright with me just be back in a couple of hours so we can open presents.”

Right, presents. Harry honestly hasn’t given presents that much thought this morning. He kind of got his early.

~•~

 “So you and Lou aren’t friends anymore?” Daisy asks, panicked.

“No we are, we just…” Harry pauses trying to simplify this for an eight-year-old’s understanding.

“We just kiss now.” Louis cuts in and smacks a kiss on his cheek.

Daisy frowns at them, obviously still very puzzled but she doesn’t bother with them much longer when Fizzy hands her another present to open.

More ripping noises sound through the living room and soon there’s added wrapping paper to the already piles and piles of green and red covering the floor. Louis sips on a mug of hot chocolate beside him, arm wrapped around Harry’s waist loosely while he looks at his family on Christmas morning so happily.

Louis tips his head on Harry’s shoulder and murmurs something into the fabric of his shirt, “I’m really happy you’re here.”

“I am too.” Harry smiles at him.

Louis sits up to give him a proper kiss, or at least as proper as can be when they’re smiles are too wide, before they’re interrupted by a shutter of the camera and bright flash.

“Well now I know the camera works.” Lottie giggles and taps away on her new phone.

Louis’ phone dings and he pulls his out of his pocket. Lottie’s sent him the picture and Harry has to admit it’s one of his favorites of both of them. They look ridiculous all nuzzled up to each other, their hair still messy, still wearing their pajamas, but so in love.

“Do you mind sending that to me?” Harry asks, sweetly.

“Not at all.” Louis obliges and sends it to him, right after he makes it his home screen.

It’s disgustingly sweet and Harry’s never been happier.

~•~

 “I’ll see you again in a couple of hours.” Harry breathes in between the kisses that Louis peppers all over his face.

“I know it’s just,” Louis kisses him on the lips for a couple of seconds “Do you really have to go? It’s cold outside, baby.”

“Did you just-”

“No.” Louis smirks.

“I really can’t stay.” Harry sings and uses all his willpower to back out of Louis’ arms.

“I’m not doing this.” Louis deadpans.

“Harry will you just go home already? You guys are going to make me throw up.” Fizzy groans and stomps into the kitchen.

Harry giggles, “Okay I’ll leave now.”

Louis pulls him in by his scarf for one last kiss and sends him on his way.

Harry still hasn’t opened any presents yet and somehow this has already been his favorite Christmas ever.

The next few hours change drastically from a slow and sweet Christmas morning, to a busy and hectic Christmas afternoon. When Harry gets home his family practically throws his presents at him and they open them hurriedly, thanking each other with a quick kiss on the cheek before they clean everything up and start to get ready for the evening.

The Tomlinsons are coming over for dinner like they have been for the past two years and there’s a lot of cooking to do before they can feed the family of eight plus themselves.

“So you’re really with Louis now?” Anne asks while whisking gravy beside Harry as he mashes potatoes.

“Yep.” Harry says, grinning down at the bowl in his hands.

“Okay,” Anne smiles back at him “Just warn me next time your boyfriend sleeps over so I can at least knock before I come in.”

That’s all that needs to be said about that.

Everything else is a blur of ham and bread rolls and pie as Harry helps his mom in the kitchen and manages to shower sometime in between that. It was like he blinked and suddenly it was four o’clock, Louis’ family set to arrive any minute now.

Harry buttons his shirt on his way down the stairs, trying not to waste a moment of his time. He can hear his mom and Gemma laughing while taking the cookies out of the oven (hopefully that’s not a bad sign). The living room is an ambrosial mixture of pine trees and vanilla and various foods being baked in the oven. For a moment it’s almost like any other Christmas until he remembers to hang the mistletoe up between the kitchen and the living room and he realizes his mother won’t be the only one kissing him underneath it this year.

He gets a moment to himself to appreciate the Christmas vibes all around him from the tree to the stereo playing _Christmas_ by Michael Buble. Then the doorbell is being rung and Harry can already hear the loud crowd of company outside and he loves them all especially the eldest son with blue, blue eyes and special smiles reserved only for Harry.

When he opens the door Harry receives eight Merry Christmas’, eight hugs, eight kisses on the cheek, and one kiss on the mouth.

“Well don’t you clean up nice.” Louis winks at him and pulls at the collar of Harry’s shirt.

“I could say the same about you.” Harry grins and grabs Louis’ by the belt loops.

“Louis come help me with the babies please!” Jay calls from somewhere behind them.

“Later.” Louis promises with a quick kiss before he schucks off his coat and sashays into the house to help his mom.

Harry doesn’t know what later means but he has a feeling he’s going to like it.

Later turns out to be too long of a wait, almost an hour after they’ve already eaten. Dinner was nice Harry supposes when he wasn’t distracted by Louis’ mouth and hands. The rest  of it was great really and thankfully no one has yet to make a big deal out of how Harry and Louis hold hands now and sometimes they kiss when they think no one’s looking.

The girls are watching _Elf_ in the living room, the grownups are drinking eggnog in the kitchen, and Louis is pulling Harry up the stairs a mischievous little grin on his lips.

“You look really fit with this on.” Louis smirks at Harry and corners him against the bed once they’re in Harry’s room.

He pushes Harry down on his back and crawls on top of him, fingers skillfully undoing each button until Harry’s torso is exposed.

“Why are you taking it off then?” Harry teases.

“Because you look even more fit with no shirt on.”

Louis kisses him, quickly. Then he starts to explore Harry’s skin with his mouth, lips dragging down his neck and to his chest.

Harry sighs contently and tugs at Louis’ hair ever so slightly.

Louis’ hand pushes Harry’s shirt out of the way and comes to his hip, thumb rubbing small circles on his bare skin that make him lean into his hand for more. Louis starts to kiss down his stomach and it feels great honestly; it has Harry buzzing with anticipation when Louis drags it out and works his way back up to Harry’s lips again.

Louis licks into his mouth, heated and longing. He tugs on Harry’s curls just to hear the little gasp Harry makes. The tug sends a pulse through his body and straight to his cock. He was half-hard before, just from anticipation and Louis being _Louis_ , but now he’s so hard it starts to feel uncomfortable constrained in his jeans.

“What do you want Harry?” Louis breathes, hot air fanning across Harry’s cheeks and his hand palms Harry’s dick lightly.

Harry moans and lifts his hips to chase the feeling of Louis’ hand against him.

“Tell me.” Louis requests from where his mouth his sucking on Harry’s neck now.

“I want,” Harry takes a deep breath “I want you to suck me off.”

Harry blushes as soon as he says it and for a second is almost afraid he’s asked too much until Louis starts to unbuckle his belt eagerly. He pulls Harry’s pants down to his knees and starts to mouth him through his boxers. Harry moans and fists the bed sheets, not really sure of what happens next just that he really needs some type of relief.

Harry’s flushed cherry red all over, heat and adrenaline running through his body from being sucked off for the first time. The thing is Louis hasn’t even put his mouth on him yet and he feels like he’s so close already, feels so good and doesn’t see how he could possibly feel better but- oh, oh Christ he was wrong.

“Lou.” Harry whines as Louis wraps a hand around the base of his dick and takes the rest in his mouth.

Louis starts to bob his head up and down combined with the stroke of his hand and it’s all too much for Harry to handle at once. He tries to take deep breaths to calm down but most of them just result in whines and moans that only seem to encourage Louis to go faster.

The only thing that keeps him from coming right away is the slight humiliation that comes with being totally exposed to the other. It’s not that Harry is insecure but Louis is the first person that’s touched his dick besides himself and definitely the first person to suck it.

But once Harry gets passed the vulnerability, he starts to be completely consumed by the heat in his stomach until he’s groaning so loud he has to bite down on his lip. At this point Louis has gotten used to Harry’s size and has stopped using his hand, taking Harry’s full length down his throat.

“I’m close.” Harry groans and, like the sixteen-year-old he is, immediately comes down Louis’ throat after.

Louis swallows it all and licks his lips after- it’s so obscene and so hot that Harry wants to remember it forever and use the image in his head whenever he gets himself off.

“You’re so beautiful Harry,” Louis kisses up Harry’s torso until he gets to his mouth and then he kisses Harry deeply on the lips.

He rolls his hips against Harry’s so that he feels how hard Louis is. The fact he’s that turned on just from sucking Harry off has Harry bewildered. He unzips Louis’ jeans and pulls them down to his thighs before rolling them over so he’s on top that way Louis doesn’t have to support himself while Harry gets him off with his hand, slightly awed by Louis’ perfect cock.

It’s everything Harry always thought it would be seeing Louis wrecked as he is now panting and moaning and flushed, eyes closed as he rocks his hips to the same rhythm Harry’s fist uses.

He comes just as quickly as Harry did which is as relieving as it is flattering to Harry who kisses him on the lips until he comes down from his high and blinks up at him.

“You have magical hands.” He grins.

Harry laughs before answering, “You have a magical mouth.”

“I’m glad we’ve established this as well as the fact that I love you.” Louis smiles.

Harry agrees.  

~•~

“So we’re telling them and pretty much guaranteeing that we’re about to be made fun of for the next couple of hours?”

“Harry if you think that I can keep my hands off of you for the next couple hours just to put off being mocked by our best friends then you are crazy.” Louis states matter-of-factly and looks up at him with defiance in his eye.

He’s just so cute that Harry wants to kiss him and then he remembers that he can, he doesn’t just have to pine anymore, so he does only to get interrupted by a snowball nailing his shoulder.

They separate and turn to look in the direction the snowball came from to see Zayn standing there with an incredulous look on his face.

“What the fuck?” He demands and trudges over to them, eyes and mouth opened wide.

“Merry Christmas.” Louis beams at him and holds up his and Harry’s interlocked hands.

Harry goes along with it and smiles at Zayn too.

“Haha I got you Zaynie!” Safaa cries out triumphantly as she smashes a snowball into Zayn’s hip.

“You’ve just made me lose my family snowball fight for the first time in four years. You have a lot of explaining to do.” Zayn demands and rips his gloves off, walking towards to the inside of his house.

“So when you were planning on telling me? Or any of us really.” Zayn interrogates once the three of them are in his basement “I bet it’s been going on for a while huh? Liam said he suspected something but I didn’t want to believe him since-”

“Liam was wrong. It- we just happened last night.” Louis corrects.

Zayn stares at them for a moment.

“Well congratulations I guess.” He says casually.

“What are we congratulating about?” Niall asks as he stomps down the stairs (he’s wearing those reindeer antlers again).

“Um,”

“We-”

“Well…”

Harry and Louis stumble for their words until Zayn gets impatient and says it for them.

“They finally got their shit together and decided to become a couple.”

“Who decided to be a couple?” Liam asks as he suddenly appears in the basement.

Zayn gestures to Harry and Louis.

No one really knows what to say for a moment until Niall bursts out laughing, “I knew I wasn’t drunk enough last night to imagine Louis’ sex hair.”

Then everyone is laughing and hugging each other hello, handing over and getting presents from each other. Of course it takes them about twenty minutes to open them since they decide to make fun of Harry and Louis with every possible penis joke imaginable.

Yeah it’s a bit much, but Harry suffers through it all and would even endure more, too happy that he has Louis by his side to really be bothered by it. 

“Ha very funny.” Zayn’s voice goes flat when he opens his present, bottles of various types of lube, and looks over to see Liam’s opened present, boxes of various types of condoms “Do you guys need some of this now?” He looks at Harry and Louis, pointed and teasing.

Harry blushes while Louis settles for a sarcastic, “We’re fine thanks.”

The rest of the presents opened are actually thoughtful and sweet. It’s a relief that everyone likes the gifts he got them. He thinks it should be easy getting presents for the four people he knows best in the world but it was actually the hardest thing.

Louis especially likes his gift.

“Harry what?” Louis asks in disbelief when he opens his card and sees two tickets for The Script concert in June.

“Merry Christmas Lou.” Harry just says, pressing a kiss to Louis’ cheek.

Louis decides to kiss the life out of Harry though, crawling into his lap and peppering kisses multiple times on his lips and everywhere else on his face.

“Is that what we were like?” Liam asks Zayn, groaning.

“Jesus I always thought you guys would be cute but I take it back after seeing this.” Niall scoffs, reaching around them for their discarded wrapping paper.

Harry laughs and grabs Louis’ face before kissing him deeply just to piss the others off. There’s a collective groan throughout the room at the sight but Louis just flips them off.

Harry’s never felt what it was like to have things so perfectly in place before now.

~•~

It’s snowing outside, snowflakes dumping out of a black night sky, the world only lit up by the barely there glow of the street lights. Normally, the complete bareness of it all would make Harry feel lonely and cold, but with Louis by his side as they walk up to Louis’ porch he feels peaceful and warm.

Once they get to the front door, Louis turns around to face Harry and stands there with his hands behind his back.

“Well that was fun.” He says and Harry isn’t sure if he means Zayn’s house or the whole day.

But based on how happy today was made the both of them, Harry would guess me means the whole day. Everything is so fun with Louis. It always has been only now there’s no internal battle with himself over what crosses the line between best friends and something more, now he gets to treat Louis how he wants without any second guesses. Now they get to hold hands in front of their families and make out in front of their friends and get each other off behind closed doors.

“Definitely.” Harry nods and cups Louis’ face with his hands, before kissing him closed-mouth and soft “I love you.” He murmurs into the little space left between him and Louis.

Even in a murmur it seems like such a big thing that stretches between them for miles, miles ahead of them that they’re going to travel together HarryandLouis as boyfriends, no longer HarryandLouis as best friends.

“Love you too.” Louis presses his smile into Harry’s neck and gives him another squeeze before reaching behind him and slowly opening the door.

“Good night Harry.” He smiles sweetly.

“Good night Lou.” Harry smiles back.

He doesn’t turn to leave until Louis is behind the closed front door.

A gust of warm air that lingered out of the house while the door was opened stays with Harry until the heater in his car warms up and takes over so that he doesn’t ever shiver.

There’s another warmth though that settles in his stomach and spreads all over his body. It doesn’t come from a heater or fire but from the pure adoration and love he feels for the boy in the house he drives away from.

~•~

Harry’s finally settled on the couch with Love Actually playing on the TV screen in front of him. It’s a little overdue considering Christmas was a couple of days ago and he’s not even watching it honestly. He’s too distracted by the little menace who’s laying in between his legs and sucking a bruise into his neck.

He’s also too turned on to keep up with the five million plots unraveling in the movie right now.

“Louis” Harry whines when he grinds his hips down, creating lovely friction between the two of them that makes Harry completely hard in his sweatpants.

Louis decides to keep dragging it out by kissing Harry on the mouth again, slow and tantalizing. He tastes like the abandoned hot chocolate sitting on the coffee table in front of them, forgotten after only a few sips when they decided their mouths were much sweeter than any drink could be.

Again, Louis starts to move his hips in circles against Harry’s. He’s wearing sweatpants too and Harry can easily feel how hard he is. That just turns him on even more, knowing that Louis is getting off on him.

Just as it starts to get a little overwhelming how close he is already, how he’s about to literally come his pants like a fourteen-year-old, Louis moans brokenly into Harry’s mouth and goes slack against him. His eyes flutter closed and his mouth drops open, that sight along with Louis’ hand still palming Harry’s dick, sends Harry over the edge.

“You’re awful.” Harry says once his breathing returns to normal.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.” Louis smirks, completely recovered already.

Harry tries to glare at him but it turns into beaming at him really quickly since he’s so endeared.

They go up to Harry’s room after that, movie and hot chocolate forgotten in exchange for clean underwear and pants.

Louis’ spread out across his bed now, patting the spot beside him for Harry to lie down in, “Cuddle me and then… then I think we need to talk about a few things.”

“So demanding.” Harry rolls his eyes playfully, joking around to avoid how his stomach’s just dipped at the sign of a serious talk they haven’t really had yet but is desperately needed before Louis goes back to college… four hours away.

“It’s nothing bad I swear. You’re stuck with me now Harold.” Louis grabs Harry’s hand and kisses his knuckles before turning on his side, wrapping Harry’s arm around him.

They’re pressed together so that Harry feels Louis’ back vibrate against his chest when he talks.

“I just want to explain how I’ve felt about you for the last couple of months.”

“Okay.” Harry smiles into Louis’ hair, relieved.

“Graduation night is where we should begin I think,” Harry stays quiet as a sign for Louis to continue “I was so drunk and so happy to finally be done with high school. A little part of me that was scared and didn’t really want to go but I just kept telling myself it was because I didn’t really know what to expect but then… Then I saw you that night and I could tell there was something bothering you. I faintly remember trying to get you to tell me what was wrong but you insisted you were fine because you’re a little shit like that,” It sounds so completely fond that Harry just laughs it off as an altered term of endearment “You looked so good even when you were sad and I just wanted to cling to you and not let go for the rest of the night, for the rest of the summer actually not even when I had to leave for college. After I realized that, it just clicked that the only reason I was still dreading leaving was because I didn’t want to leave you. I was in love with you.”

“Don’t you think it would have been a good idea to tell me that?” Harry teases.

“Yes,” Louis huffs “But I was scared you didn’t feel the same way.”

Harry nudges him, “Didn’t feel the same way? Lou, you’ve heard so many people the past couple of days talking about how they always knew we were going to happen because I looked so gone for you.”

“I know, I know but other times I just couldn’t believe that you were stupid enough to fall in love with your best friend like I had,” Louis is silent for a moment and when he speaks again he almost sounds embarrassed which is rare coming from him “There were a few guys I met at school. They were just random hooks up though that would only last for a few days before one of us stopped calling back and it was only ever hand or mouth stuff. I’m still a virgin technically. But I think I was just excited to be out and for there to be more than a handful of guys to choose from like there is in high school. Besides that, it wasn’t even enjoyable really because I just thought about you the whole time, how I always thought you would be my first everything for some reason, about they weren’t as attractive or as funny or as gentle as you.” Harry tries to swallow down the blush that creeps up his cheeks and this giddy feeling climbing up his throat that threatens to make him squeal. He’s jealous of those guys still but relieved that he gets to be Louis’ first.

And it’s amazing to him that they both went the last few months thinking about each other all the time.

“I met Greg just a couple of weeks before I came home and he’s really the only one that ever came close and even then he was still off by miles compared to you. When I came home I just wanted to try and not be completely obvious with how much I wanted you so I talked to him a lot to counteract how I treated you. But when you called me gorgeous and said you wanted to kiss me after you had just had your hands all over me, I just gave in because I finally knew what we had wasn’t just one-sided.” Louis sounds much happier now. Harry wants to tell him that there wasn’t anything to ever be embarrassed of when it comes to hooking up with other guys, but he lets Louis carry on.

 “I talked to Greg yesterday and told him what happened,” Louis shrugs “He was pretty cool about it which was to be expected considering we weren’t that far into things.”

“So you’re all mine now?” Harry asks, completely beaming as he turns Louis around and crawls on top of him.

“Yes I’m all yours now.” He giggles.

“You better visit more often than every four months then.” Harry says, only partly-kidding.

“I’m gonna come home a lot more often than I have been don’t worry,” Harry rests his head on Louis’ chest while Louis strokes his hair gently making him sign in contentment “I’ve talked it over with my mom and she said that she knows I’m worried about my grades but that I shouldn’t let it stop me from being happy,” He pauses and starts again more seriously “I’m just scared that if I’m not careful I’ll go back to how I was a couple of years ago when I didn’t care about anything because I do care now, a lot. I want to make something out of myself and it doesn’t have to be something special like an actor or a professional soccer player,” He laughs at himself “As long as it’s something I love.”

“I know you could do anything you wanted and you will, but listen to your mom and come home more often. I’m not going another four months without seeing you.” Harry nuzzles his head into Louis’ neck and holds him a little tighter.

“Don’t worry love, I won’t.”

It sounds like a promise and Harry’s not worried now. He’s not worried about anything anymore because he has an explanation for everything. He has Louis’ honesty and his love.

That’s enough. He could go a year without seeing Louis if he had to as long as he knew that Louis was completely his.

~•~

Throwing a party at his house with his sister on New Year’s Eve while his parents were away seemed like a horrible idea to Harry at first. All he could picture when she brought it up was people throwing up in the backyard, breaking things inside in the house, and strangers having sex in his bed. Then of course there was that possibility, though small, of getting caught. Somehow Gemma managed to convince him, along with the help of Louis who thought it would be a great idea- no surprise there really.

And now standing here in his living room, music blasting through the whole house and a red plastic cup in his hand, he feels ridiculous for ever thinking this would be a bad idea.

Unlike how he pictured it, there’s only a small crowd of people of about twenty or so people, all of which he knows by name and is quite friendly with. The music is good too since Gemma let him take charge of that. He’s got something in his cup that has a hint of vanilla to it, he’s not sure what it is but it’s good, and then he has his boy right by his side.

When Louis had convinced Harry to throw the party a couple of months ago, Harry was sure Louis would spend the night floating around the house going from person to person and he pictured some older boy crowded up against him at the end of the night leaving Harry feeling sad for himself and irrevocably jealous. He never would have imagined Louis staying at his side all night, leaning into Harry’s touch, kissing him in between conversation with people who wandered over to them and smiled when they saw how close the two of them were. He never would have imagined that after midnight this New Year’s he was going to lose his virginity to Louis in his childhood bedroom but it’s been decided that’s definitely happening tonight.

“Hey quit drinking, don’t want you to be too drunk later.” Harry murmurs into Louis’ neck, teasing.

“Look who’s talking.” Louis scoffs and knocks his cup against Harry’s.

“Cheers.” Harry giggles and takes a big drink.

Louis laughs at him and takes Harry’s cup from his hands, “Slow down!”

His heads feels like it’s swimming but in a nice way, not in a way that affects his mobility or clouds his thoughts, but enough so that he’s loose and happy and excited for the rest of the night to unravel.

Louis pats his cheek and saunters away with both their cups in his hands. Harry would be more upset if he knew he wasn’t just going to get them more.

“An hour ‘til midnight Harry! What’re you gonna wish for?” Niall comes out from nowhere, drunk and loud as ever.

“I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to kiss someone at midnight Niall, not make a wish.” Harry claps him on the shoulder and directs him to the kitchen where Zayn and Liam are playing against two girls at beer pong.

They’re losing horribly and if their lack of cups wasn’t obvious then the way they hang all over each other, laughing at everything and kissing each other more often than usual is a dead giveaway they’re on their way to being plastered.

“Who’re you gonna kiss?” Niall laughs.

“I think maybe Louis.”

“Do you really think he’d go for you?” He asks, managing to school his composure to something serious.

“Fuck off.” Harry laughs and shoves Niall outside.

The fresh air will sober him up some.

For the next twenty minutes, Harry continues to watch Zayn and Liam lose horribly. They’re kind of a riot drunk off their asses like this. Zayn keeps using a funny accent which makes Liam giggle uncontrollably until Zayn kisses him then they make out until the girls yell at them to take their turn already. They lose of course but they take it in stride and run off to a corner somewhere probably to blow each other. Harry’s sure of it.

“Here you go babe.” Louis finally shows up with drinks in hand and passes one to Harry.

It couldn’t have come at better time considering Harry was starting to lose his buzz while simultaneously starting to wonder what was taking Louis so long.

“Thanks.” Harry kisses Louis on the cheek sweetly and smiles contently when Louis wraps an arm around his waist and pulls him close.

“Hey you two!” Gemma grabs Harry’s wrist and looks at him sternly “I need you to watch for midnight and when it gets to be ten seconds before turn down the music and start counting.”

“Why can’t you do it?” Harry counters.

“Because I’m already quite out of it Harry. Don’t disappoint me.” She shakes him by the shoulders, some of her drink sloshes out of her cup and onto his shirt.

Then she’s on her merry little way again.

“I should probably go watch the clock.” Harry hesitantly unwraps himself from Louis’ hold.

“Not yet you don’t,” Louis insists and grabs Harry’s wrist “You’ve got at least twenty more minutes.”

“You’re right.” Harry smiles and sets down his cup.

He puts his hands on Louis’ hips and pulls him close. Harry leans against the counter and studies Louis pressed flush against him. His hair is artfully messy so that it only makes him want to run his fingers through it, he’s glowing from the crowds of people and the alcohol and Harry hopes that he’s part of the reason too. It’s so noisy, a combination of music and drunken chatter from everyone but it’s so easy to focus on Louis. He pushes up Louis’ shirt away and rubs Louis’ skin that radiates warmth with his thumbs.

“Are you just gonna stare at me or are you gonna kiss me?” Louis teases and brushes his nose against Harry’s.

“A little bit of both.” Harry giggles and tilts his head to fit his mouth against Louis.

He’s pliant and warm in Harry’s hands which is hard not to find appealing so he pulls Louis closer and bites his lip just to get some kind of reaction. Louis hums and pushes his leg in between Harry’s. They’re lined up together, every part of them touching and Harry feels hot, hot, hot.

“Harry! I told you to keep an eye on the clock not make out with your boyfriend!” Gemma chastises from somewhere on Harry’s side.

It takes a lot of self-control on Harry’s part to pull away from Louis’ lips and turn to look at her. She’s glaring at him with her hands on her hips and Harry knows she won’t leave him alone until he goes.

“I’ll come find you at midnight.” Louis promises and kisses Harry one more time.

Harry can feel Louis’ smile and it stays with him as he stumbles into the living room to the stereo where his phone is hooked up. He glances up at the analog clock hung on the wall, takes note of the time, and makes conversation with the people around him.

It’s meaningless small talk since it’s hard to focus when his whole head is a conglomeration of thoughts on Louis and he’s a little hard from feeling Louis go pliant underneath his touch a few minutes ago. His heartbeat thrums in anticipation to touch him again, to have all of Louis and be inside of him. The wait is only until after midnight which inches closer and closer until Harry has Niall shout out a two minute warning.

Zayn and Liam make their over, both of them an absolute mess but beaming brighter than any stream of lights Gemma has strung up around the house tonight.

“You guys have been kissing the whole night. What’s the point of counting down until midnight?” Niall knocks back his drink and scans the room, probably looking for a random girl to make out with in a minute.

“We like to keep it traditional.” Liam says and both of them giggle about it.

Harry shakes his head fondly.

“I’m ready for my midnight kiss,” Louis appears behind him and presses his lips to Harry’s neck murmuring into his skin “And for what’s to come after that.”

Harry shivers and leans back into Louis’ solid stature behind him.

“Jesus Christ I’m the only one who knows how to wait.” Niall grumbles.

Harry sees how he inches towards a brunnette that’s caught his eye.

“One minute!” Someone shouts.

Harry watches as people start to shift and pull each other in so that most people are standing by who they plan to kiss and the other’s are taking shots, too pleasantly drunk to be bothered by their lack of companionship. Either that or they just don’t really care. A couple people start to count down from thirty but most turn to look at the person next to them as does Harry.

Louis looks so inviting, arms and hands even more so when they pull Harry in.

“I love you Harry.” Louis smiles and tugs a ringlet by Harry’s ear.

“I love you too.”

They’re aligned perfectly now, waiting and counting with the rest of them for the last ten seconds. Harry pauses the music.

“Ten!”

“Nine!”

“Eight!”

“Seven!”

“Six!”

“Five!”

“Four!”

“Three!”

Louis stands on his tippy toes and both of them let the crowd finish with the last two seconds as they give in to each other. Kazoos Harry didn’t even know they had go off around them and people cheer excitedly. Harry manages to put the music back on with one hand and a happy, upbeat song booms through the house- it couldn’t have come at a more perfect time.

Everyone screams Happy New Year around him. Harry agrees. So much has happened at the end of this last year that he knows the one ahead of him can only be just as exciting and fulfilling. Louis’ kisses like he’s sure the road ahead of them holds nothing but promise and it’s hard for Harry not to be sure of that too.

“Hey let’s go upstairs.” Louis smiles and breaths against Harry’s lips.

Harry nods and takes him by the hand so they can fall into bed together. He can’t think of a better way to start the new year.

Everyone must have listened to Niall and come downstairs when he gave the two minute warning because thankfully there’s no one in Harry’s room but he can tell by the way his comforter is hanging lopsidedly that someone was here before. He doesn’t let himself think about that though as he locks his door and pulls the comforter off completely. There’s enough light coming in through the opened blinds that Harry thinks he’ll leave the light off, if only to calm his own nerves a little.

Louis crawls up the foot of the bed to the pillows and lays, stretched out and completely all for Harry. Harry discards his shirt and makes his way over so that he’s hovering above Louis, kissing him slowly but anxiously. The good kind of anxious- the kind he gets when he’s ready and excited for something to happen and butterflies flutter all around his stomach.

Louis arches into Harry, their hips grinding together for only a moment but it’s long enough for Harry to feel him already getting hard. That makes him groan into Louis’ neck before biting and sucking at his skin there so Louis’ moaning in his ear and grinding his hips against Harry steadily now. When Harry’s sure he’s made a mark, he sits back and straddles Louis so he can’t take off his shirt. He looks just as breathtaking as he did the first time, burning, golden skin that Harry runs his hands over every inch of trying to take it all in.

Then Louis bucks his hips which creates some friction but it’s restrained with their jeans on which is why Harry is grateful when Louis unbuckles both their pants and makes Harry move off of him so they can take them off.

Louis lying in Harry’s bed in only his little black boxers which are tented from his hard cock is something Harry wants to savor forever. But as it is, he’s really turned on and needs to be inside Louis already, he doesn’t have the patience or the strength to kiss every inch of Louis’ body. That will have to be saved for another time.

Harry mouths Louis through his boxers and watches Louis’ mouth open and close, his eyes shutting with pure bliss. It’s a little nerve racking for Harry who’s never had his mouth on someone’s cock before but he pulls Louis’ boxers down, stroking him a couple of times until Louis’ whining then Harry puts his mouth on him. He focuses on keeping his teeth away and sucks gently but it coaxes a loud moan from Louis that has Harry determined to be good for Louis.

“That feels so good babe.” Louis breathes.

He sounds so worked up that it sends heat rushing through Harry’s body straight to his dick.

Harry timidly sucks him off until he’s completely hard then he pulls off and brings himself back to eye level with Louis. He strokes Louis’ cock as he fumbles around to find the lube and condoms in a drawer in his dresser beside his bed. Louis takes the lube from his hands as soon as he finds it.

“I can do myself, if you want to, like, see how I like it.” Louis suggests, cheeks flushed prettily.

Harry nods and tries not to start stroking himself as he watches Louis slick up his fingers and reach down to circle his own hole. It’s better than any porn Harry’s ever watched.

Louis gasps when he pushes one finger in, slowly working it in and out of himself so he can stretch open for two. Once he gets to two he starts to scissors his fingers then he curves his fingers a certain way so that it makes him moan loudly and his eyes flutter shut.

It’s so hot that Harry could come just from watching this but he wants to touch, he wants to learn the ins and outs of Louis’ body. He coats his fingers with lube and gently removes Louis’ hand, quickly replacing with his own. Louis whines and squirms at the feel of two of Harry’s fingers inside him, much longer than his own. Harry tries to copy exactly what Louis did moving around until he finds that spot again that makes Louis curse above him.

“Put three in.” Louis demands.

Harry does as he’s told and works a third finger inside Louis, he tries to hit Louis’ prostate with every stroke.

“Jesus Harry.” Louis moans.

Harry loves watching his face, scrunched and focus trying so hard not to come from just Harry’s hand. His mouth has been open ever since Harry’s fingers got inside of him, lips bitten cherry red. He’s still flushed that pretty, cherry red.

Harry’s dick twitches when Louis picks up the condom and rips it open.

“I’m ready.” Louis pulls Harry’s hair, as a gesture for him to stop.

Harry takes the condom from Louis and puts it on, slicking up his cock. Louis sits up and kneels before pulling Harry in for a kiss that’s wet and heated. There’s so much passion behind it, it makes Harry’s toes curl. Louis puts his hand on Harry’s shoulders and slowly pushes him down to lay on his back. Once he’s lying flat on his back, Louis straddles him and takes his cock in hand slowly easing himself down on it. He’s gorgeous above Harry likes this, sweating and biting his lip while he sinks down until his ass is pressed against Harry’s thighs. Once he’s breathing deeply, adjusting to Harry’s size, he rolls his hips in a way that elicits a moan from the both of them.

“I love you.” Harry breathes as Louis starts to ride Harry’s cock slowly.

“Love you too.” Louis moans and lifts his hips up even further, taking in Harry’s whole cock every time he sinks down again.

Harry grabs Louis’ ass with one hand and puts the other on his hip helping him lift him up some. He starts to thrust up too so that Louis’ thighs don’t have to do all the work. Although Harry’s sure they could.

“Fuck, Harry.” Louis moans, such filthy words coming from such a pretty mouth.

“Love you.” Harry says again because he’s so filled with love and amazement watching this beautiful boy give everything up to him.

He doesn’t saying anything because he comes a moment later all over Harry’s torso. The noises he makes as he reaches his climax sends Harry over the edge, into a blissful orgasm better than anything he’s ever felt before. He doesn’t have any control over the words and noises that fall from his mouth; he knows he’s being loud and anyone who passes by can probably hear them but Harry likes that. He likes the thought of everyone knowing he and Louis just fucked and it was so good too.

Louis falls beside Harry, cuddling up into his side and pressing soft, loving kisses all over Harry’s burning skin.

“That was amazing.” Louis murmurs and sucks a bruise into Harry’s neck. “I love you so much.”

Harry can finally function again so he wraps an arm around Louis’ waist and pulls him closer, kissing his forehead, “You’re amazing. I’m so glad we did that.”

Their eyes meet and they stare at each other for a moment, Harry can see Louis’ blue eyes sparkle even in the dark. He’s sure he looks the same way, filled with so much happiness and contentment, filled with so much love.

Louis kisses him, so slowly and reverently that he leaves Harry dizzy. He pulls a sheet over them and tangles their legs together.

“Happy New Year Harry.”

And it is. It’s a great start to the next twelve months ahead of them.

“Happy New Year love.”

~•~

Louis’ arms are locked tightly around Harry’s waist; partly because it’s freezing outside this January morning but mostly because he’s leaving with Zayn in about five minutes to go back to school. Harry rests his head against Louis’ who has his face buried in Harry’s neck. He can see Zayn and Liam wrapped up in each other too, sharing whispered secrets and quick kisses. It’s quiet; the air around them smoky from their labored breathing.

It’s peaceful even with this sense of longing tugging on Harry’s heart that knows as well as him Louis is going to be gone for the next couple of weeks. A couple of weeks isn’t that long considering Louis hadn’t been home in months before now. But on the other hand it is a really long time considering Harry has been waiting so long to be able to hug and kiss Louis. Now he has to stop so Louis can go back to school though. Four hours away.

There’s skype of course, and texting and calling and snapchatting. Harry thinks he’ll have to cope with those but it won’t be as terrible as before. Now he knows Louis is his and he’s probably smiling down stupidly at his phone too every time he gets a message from Harry.

“As much fun as this is for you guys I’m sure, can we please hurry up? I’m fucking freezing.” Niall shuffles into Harry’s sight, arms wrapped tightly around himself, head buried into his coat as he shivers and his teeth chatter.

“Oh for god’s sake Niall.” The sound of Louis’ voice is muffled by Harry’s coat.

He places a little kiss into the side of Harry’s neck and pulls away.

“I expect you to text me while I’m on my way home so I have something to do while Zayn whines about Liam.” Louis says.

“I won’t be the only one whining this time pal.” Zayn scoffs and makes his way over to hug Niall and Harry goodbye.

After Harry hugs Zayn and tells him he loves him (and of course to take care of Louis- to which Zayn just rolled his eyes at) he opens the car door for Louis, shuts it, and leans his head through the window.

“I love you. Have a safe trip.” He kisses Louis hard and warmly so that it makes his cold lips tingle afterwards.

“I will. Love you too Harry,” Louis pats Harry’s cheek with his hand and smiles softly.

It’s the typical smile he uses only for Harry. There’s a hint of sadness twisted into it that Harry kisses away one more time before reluctantly stepping back so Zayn can back out of his driveway.

“I’m surprised you two actually let them go.” Niall chuckles and wraps his arms around Harry and Liam. Huddled together like that, they wave off Zayn and Louis until they drive out of view.

Harry stares at the spot where they disappeared, lost in thought, until Niall nudges his side, “Cheer up, you’ll see your boy soon.”

Harry laughs softly, remembering all the other times he’s heard something like that. Niall had always just said him or Louis and it always felt like the end of an era between HarryandLouis when he did, but now hearing Niall say your boy, it feels a lot like the beginning.


End file.
